The Doctor: Ah! Yes! Blimey, sorry! Christmas Eve on a rooftop, I saw a chimney... my whole brain just went... "What the hell!"
The Doctor: Ah! Big, flashy, lighty thing, that's why I'm here! Big, flashy, lighty things have got me written all over them--well, not really. Give me time. And a crayon.
The Doctor: I'd eat my hat. If I hat a hat. I'd eat someone's hat, maybe if they weren't using it--sorry, I'm rambling now, because THIS THING ISN'T WORKING!
Kazran: The controls are isomorphic. One-to-one. They only respond to me.
The Doctor: Ohh, you fibber! "Isomorphic." There's no such thing.
The Doctor: ... these controls are isomorphic.
Amy: I've sent for help.
Captain: Who are you?
Amy: I have this friend of mine, okay? And he can help.
Captain: And what are you wearing?
Amy:That's not important.
Captain: Are you from the honeymoon suite?
Amy: Oh... shut up.
Rory: Amy! The light's stopped flashing, does that mean he's coming?
Helmsman: Honeymoon suite?
Rory: Oh, Clothes! It... is... just a bit of fun.
Amy: Really! Shut up!
The Doctor: Oh, I wouldn't bother calling your servants, they quit. Apparently they won the lottery at the exact same time. Which is a bit lucky, when you think about it.
Kazran: There isn't any lottery.
The Doctor: Yeah, as I say: Lucky.
The Doctor: Hi, I'm the Doctor. I'm your new babysitter!
Young Kazran: Where's Mrs. Mantebarney?
The Doctor: Oh, you'll never guess, clever ol' Mrs. Manty! She only went and won the lottery!
Old Kazran: THERE ISN'T ANY LOTTERY!
Young Kazran: There isn't any lottery.
The Doctor: I know! What a woman!
Young Kazran: If you're my new babysitter, why are you climbing in the window?
The Doctor: Because if I was climbing out of the window, I'd be going in the wrong direction. Pay attention.
The Doctor: Right, so what are we gonna do? Eat crisps and talk about girls? I've never done that, but I bet it's easy. Girls, yeah?
Young Kazran: Are you really a babysitter?
The Doctor: I think you'll find that I'm universally recognized as a mature and responsible adult.
Young Kazran: ... it's just a lot of wavy lines.
The Doctor: ... yeah, it shorted out. Finally, a lie too big. Yeah, not really a babysitter, but this Christmas Eve, you don't want a real one. You want me.
Young Kazran: Why? What's so special about you?
The Doctor: Have you ever seen Mary Poppins?
Young Kazran: No.
The Doctor: Good, because that comparison would have been rubbish.
The Doctor: Well, concentrating at the pluses, you've definitely got a story of your own now. Also, I got a good look at the fish, so I think I understand how the fog works, which is gonna help me land a spaceship in the future and save a lot of lives! And I'm going to get some very interesting readings off of my sonic screwdriver when I get it back from the shark in your bedroom.
Young Kazran: There's a SHARK in my BEDROOM?!
The Doctor: Oh, fine! Focus on that part!
Kazran: I think she's going to kiss me.
The Doctor: Yeah, I think you're right.
Kazran: I've never kissed anyone before... what do I do?
The Doctor: Well... Try and be all nervous and rubbish and a bit shaky.
Kazran: ... Why?
The Doctor: Because you're gonna be like that anyway. Might as well make it part of the plan, then you'll feel it on purpose. Now go.
Kazran: [comes back again] Now? I kiss her now?
The Doctor: Look, it's this, or go to your room and design a new kind of screwdriver. Don't make my mistakes!
